this one is for you, r.

every person i know disapproves of us, but i stay. every time i'm with you, regardless of what we're going through, it never seems to be enough. your presence makes me confident. i know i hurt you. it happened. you are important. i want you to know that. every minute i spend with you, i never want anyone else to feel it. i'm selfish. you have you're own messed up qualities and so do i. we're a messed up couple. but right now, my eyes are getting teary & my throat is choking up. is this your final straw? are you done with everything that happened? i look back and have only one regret - to not have flirted with him. my mistakes are leading us to our downfall. you came back to me and i'm trying. i call when i can. i text when i can. i'm anxious to see you. i'm putting on makeup because you're the only one i'm getting ready for. i'm being a silly five year old, but honestly i have no idea what you're thinking. it's a foreign territory that even i can't gain access to.